Why Zombies?

Since the (fairly) modern film industry was created, people have imagined and sprouted crazy thoughts and ideas about ghosts, zombies, vampires - the whole lot. People are always going to try and freak you out or scare you with these ideas, and don't worry. Nothing like that can happen! Think about it. If somebody randomly came up to you and bit you, chances are you will get an infected bite, not a ravaging virus that turns you into a flesh eating monster. If these iconic films, like Night of the Living Dead were never made, only another fictional monster would take the place of zombies in the many false claims of 2012, and hopefully after reading the contents of this website your mind will be put at rest.

What does the word 'Zombie' define?

Although Wikipedia is not the most credible source, the opening lines to the Zombie page are as quoted: "a 'Zombie' is a term used to describe a hypnotized person bereft of consciousness and self-awareness, yet ambulant and able to respond to surrounding stimuli." In other words, the true definition of a zombie is not the 'raised dead' or the 'living dead', it is just a heavily hypnotised person with extreme limitations to brain and mind activity. However, this is not the only definition Wikipedia hands out to us. It gives mention to Voodoo (or vodou) in West African culture, which briefly explained on the Wiki page, is the practise of a witch doctor reviving a member of the dead and placing a Vodou spell on them, to then be completely under the command of the witch doctor. Now unless the world becomes overpopulated by either professional hypnotists or West African witch doctors in the upcoming months until December 2012, the thought of a zombie apocalypse suddenly seems ridiculous.

The West African 'witch doctor' theory is actually an elaborate and revised hoax. What they really do is offer a certain potion to a (very much) alive human, with the potion being partly made up of some of the the toxins from a puffer-fish and partly made up of other non nameable chemicals. This strong concoction sends the person into a deep coma which, with the limited resources they have in the villages where this is practiced, can trick the people into believing the person in question is dead. The 'witch doctor' then digs up the person when convenient. The potion is so strong that even after the coma the person is in a trance-like state and a lot of his/her memory has been lost. The so called 'witch doctor' then sets the person free to fuel the belief that he/she has returned to life as a zombie.

The rationality of the situation

There have been many people who have tried to scientifically justify the existence of a brainless monster bent on devouring human flesh, whether it's truly undead or just infected with a horrible disease that severely damages brain function.

Either creature isn't likely to cause a zombie apocalypse for several reasons. True undeath is completely impossible. The human body is operated by electrical impulses, and decaying tissues would be unable to produce, let alone carry the electrical current needed to operate the human body. Even if this wasn't the case, zombies would actually pose very little threat. They would soon be devoured by bacteria, carrion-eating insects, and even large animals that would have no difficulty at all taking down something as slow and mindless as a movie-typical zombie. Furthermore, they would be decimated by extreme temperatures: frozen tissue can't move (and cold destroys it anyway), and heat would cause putrification and quick dehydration to the zombie. If they are undead then they can't heal, and all of the teeny-tiny damages you take for granted (eg, bruises, scratches) would be devastating to the zombie because pathogens (bacteria, viruses etc.) would have very easy access into the body. Also, the eyes begin cloud over about three hours after death, which would effectively render the zombie blind before long.

Conclusion

Even if the zombie wasn't truly undead, a creature that has little to no ability to reason is a very poor match for one that does. Humans aren't the dominant species because they're faster or stronger than the other animals on this planet; we're the dominant species because we're smart and adaptable. Our species succeeded in outcompeting every other species of Homo on the planet we met, and they were a whole lot smarter and faster than zombies in the movies. Zombies wouldn't stand a chance.

Scrape TV

This article from ScrapeTV.com claims that President Obama has set an initiative to prepare for a zombie apocalypse… Although this is a parody, it is an example of what some people could be led to believe